Posted on February 3, 2009 - by Amanda

Appropriate Behavior for Religious Services

By Amy Bruggeman

Appropriate Behavior for Religious Services

You’ve chosen proper attire for visiting a house of worship – now to behave in such a manner that will keep you from heaping shame upon you, your family, your friends and anyone even remotely connected to you.

Buddhism

The leader may be called Rinpoche, Lama, Venerable, Reverend, or His Holiness – depending upon the denomination.  If you are unsure, use Venerable. If you are visiting a temple where they do not speak English, there may be a temple secretary with whom you may speak. Before entering the temple remove your shoes and hats. Once inside the temple, be aware of your body language: when sitting, do not point your feet at a cleric or the Buddhist shrine; when standing, do not turn your back to them. Never place items with Buddhist images on the floor.

Christianity

Since Christianity is a catch-all for denominations that center-around Christ’s resurrection – religious services vary widely, even within the same denomination. The leader may be called Father, Reverend, or Pastor, depending upon the denomination. Most churches provide a bulletin – containing brief or detailed information pertaining to the service. Some denominations consider it disrespectful to speak during the service; therefore the entire service is in writing – readings, hymn numbers, when to stand, when to kneel.

In most cases, all are encouraged to attend and participate in worship activities, from songs to prayers. However, some denominations restrict communion to baptized Christians or members of the church. This is often announced before the elements are distributed.

Often Christian services will include a time of greeting. The best advice I can give you is this: do not panic! Simply turn to those around you, smile, and offer your hand. If attending a Catholic mass, when the priest says “peace be with you” you respond with “and with you” – then it’s “peace be with you” all around. However, if you happen to lose all words at this critical juncture, a smile and handshake will do.

Hinduism

The leader may be called Priest, Pandit, or Pujari depending on the denomination.  Traditional address for clergy is Swamiji. If you cannot speak with the leader due to a language barrier, a temple president may be available. Before entering the main sanctuary remove your shoes. Once seated within the sanctuary, be aware of body language: your feet should never point toward the shrine. The traditional Hindu greeting is “Namaste” – which means “I bow to you” – it is said with palms together at chest, and a slight bow.

Islam

An Imam is the one who leads prayers and may speak on behalf of the congregation. When visiting a mosque, the most important thing to remember is this: modesty applies to more than just your attire. Do not be the first to greet someone of the opposite sex. Most prayer halls are separated by sex: make certain you enter through the women’s entrance – and remove your shoes before doing so. Do not walk in front of someone in prayer, as it is considered impolite. As for the traditional greeting: “Salaam Alaykum” (Peace be upon you); and in response, “Wa Alaykum Salaam” (And upon you Peace).

Judaism

A Rabbi leads worship services. The synagogue may be called a temple (Reform) or shul (Orthodox); in most shuls, women sit in a separate section. The most sacred feature of synagogue is the ark – the cabinet where the Torah resides. Never enter or leave the main sanctuary while the ark is open.

Final thoughts

Obviously, this is a very broad overview; but where we leave off, common sense should pick up. Turn off your cell phone or set it to vibrate. If at all possible, do not enter or leave in the midst of the worship service. Kids do and say the darnedest things. If you have them with you, sit near an exit – just in case you need to make a quick getaway. And if you just aren’t sure how to behave, the best modus operandi is to simply watch those around you.

Above all, remember this: you are a visitor in this house of worship. Even if you do not agree with the teachings, remain respectful. Even if you don’t necessarily know what you’re doing, be sincere. Even if respect and sincerity is all you have to offer, you’ll more than likely be welcome.

Once again, we welcome comments from readers who practice these religions.